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yes.i have found you.but i have lost you too.its very tiring to have two guys revolving around you.both treating you so well and loving you like you are the last.its driving me to the wall.him and me became friends while G and me are still friends.but ambiguity is shrouding amongst the three of us.and i hate to admit that i am in the midst of this tangled mass.i feel that G hasn't been very honest to me.well,what can i say?i am not THAT close to me and he isn't treating me what i feel a guy should treat me...i think i shouldn't be too close with him.shouldn't be too nice or give him any chance.i am tired of this love thing.of this mind torturing shit.every movie i watch just makes me cry.reminds me of what he has done for me.EVERYTHING.nobody is perfect and so he is the most perfect man i ever had in my life.i could foresee myself losing him soon.one day in a mall, he sees me and G/or whoever together, holding hands and dang!that's it i will lose him forever.i will regret it.i am sure and i am never so sure in my life that he's perfect.he's what every girl(or at least me) wants.someone that feels so much like my family, so much a part of my life that i can't do without him anymore.i must still talk to him every night,hear greetings from him every morning,be with him every now and then.just having him by my side.no words.no speech.just a smile.that's really enough.just him in my house.just him wiping my sweat.just him taking care of me.everything.there's no love in the world.just feelings grown as days past and communication.that feeling i have with angeline and kiyo and everyone else dear to me.my first.i can't leave him.i realized.cos i am part of him and he is part of me.why am i not doing anything to stop it?
